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When your friend suggests going out for fun, your immediate thought is:
Let's go! Adventure time!
Can I bring my blanket?
I'd rather watch paint dry.
Only if there's free food.
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How do you feel about your alarm clock in the morning?
My cheerful wake-up buddy!
The enemy of humanity.
What's an alarm clock?
It's complicated - we're in therapy.
When someone says 'How are you?', you typically respond:
Fantastic! Life is great!
Do you want the short or long version?
I plead the fifth.
Better than my plants (they're dead).
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Your ideal weekend involves:
Skydiving and party hopping!
Bed, snacks, repeat.
Crying over cute animal videos.
Organizing my sock drawer by color.
When faced with a challenging task, you:
Bring it on! Challenge accepted!
I'll start tomorrow... maybe.
Curl into a ball and hum.
Delegate to my future self.
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